Gadaffi al-Pimpernel!

"Concerns had already surfaced following the unexplained killing in July of the rebels' military commander, Abdel Fattah Younes, after he was taken into custody by his own side for questioning."(BBC).

US Secretary of State Hillary Clinton called for room service and was anything but pleased with the cold camel kebab."Yes, yes of course I KNOW!...am I not the right hand of that man who snatched away that which should have been mine!!  Now to business. Tell that 138 tribal rabble known as 'The Rebels' or NTC or whatever they're calling themselves, tell them from me to take "a firm stand against violent extremism." HRC popped her gum, "These Islamist fighters, shape shifting among the anti-G's must be routed out before I give someone a good slap...or does moi have to do everything? More gum. Now!" The sky darkened, well it was night. "And do keep Slick you-know-who out of the loop." Two am and the oil lamps smoked. "And...why does MG have his own TV channel? she yelled to her nodding off but now startled staffers."Jon Stewart next? Before my 7am oaty bar I want that Berber squawker silenced!"

That Illinois bitch is no way a match for my beloved Ricey.



(Photo: Copyright Control)

iPhone Proto AWAL...Again!

An iPhone 15+ prototype was left in a San Francisco/LA/NY  bar/restaurant/brothel perhaps in June/July/August? "We was soooo loaded and it was warm so it could have been summer and either the weekend or sometime maybe Monday to Friday." wondered the 20 something Jake.

Yep, bought off ebay. I just love it!

"Anyway, Jebbers and me were doing our 'we are such clever smooooth bastards' act, and he was tossing the top-secret new big thing from us Appleti boys over to me; well... it sort of dematerialised... and that's the crock of sillies we told S.J."
What are we working on now? "Oh, Jebbs and me are 3*** McD fries and burger guys. Awesome, eh"


(Photo: Copyright Control). 

Reprise: DD...

Hi there dunkies. Now...quite a few folks who's a'mighty partial to that dunkin' donut ritual have been asking me; what's exactly in these thar donuts that keeps me awake nites just athinkin' about ma nearest 24 hour DD? An' what has me turnin' up day after day, week after week for more of that diddly dunkin' dipin' fun?
Well friends, just you stop awonderin'!

INGREDIENTS: Donut: Enriched Unbleached Wheat Flour (Wheat Flour, Malted Barley Flour, Niacin, Iron as Ferrous Sulfate, Thiamin Mononitrate, Enzyme, Riboflavin, Folic Acid), Palm Oil, Water, Dextrose, Soybean Oil, Whey (a milk derivative), Skim Milk, Yeast, Contains less than 2% of the following: Salt, Leavening (Sodium Acid Pyrophosphate, Baking Soda), Defatted Soy Flour, Wheat Starch, Mono and Diglycerides, Sodium Stearoyl Lactylate, Cellulose Gum, Soy Lecithin, Guar Gum, Xanthan Gum, Artificial Flavor, Sodium Caseinate (a milk derivative), Enzyme, Colored with (Turmeric and Annatto Extracts, Beta Carotene), Eggs; Crunch Topping: Sugar, Coconut, Yellow Corn Flour, Caramel Color, BHT (antioxidant); Glaze: Sugar, Water, Maltodextrin, Contains 2% or less of the following: Mono and Diglycerides, Agar, Cellulose Gum, Citric Acid, Potassium Sorbate (Preservative), Artificial Flavor; Apple Filling: Water, Sugar Syrup, Corn Syrup, Evaporated Apples, Modified Food Starch, Contains 2% or less of the following: Natural Flavors, Citric Acid, Sodium Benzoate and Potassium Sorbate (Preservatives), Salt, Cinnamon, Malic Acid, Nutmeg.

Hi Andy...yeah my usual please.


(Photos: Copyright, Sue Roberts)

CEOs Get Paid Extra to Stiff the Taxman - Outrage - TheStreet

Just go to the link and read. If in the US and pay taxes, see how long before rising blood pressure pops out your eyes. If it won't show try: www.thestreet.com and search for the story....or wear yourself out by typing in the full monty:
http://thestreet.com/story11235596/1/ceos-get-paid-to-stiff-the-taxman-outrage.html

Michael Vick

"Vick and the Philadelphia Eagles agreed Monday to a six-year contract that again makes the Pro Bowl quarterback one of the NFL's highest-paid players. NFL Network's Michael Lombardi reported the contract is worth $100 million, according to a league source, and NFL Network insider Jason La Canfora also cited a league source in reporting that $36 million of the total amount is guaranteed." (NFL.com)

Michael Vick.

You still that real old softy, dog lovin' guy Mr Vick? Of course you are; even though some folks might thinks it's a tad obscene them amount of football playin' reward $$$$$'s considerin' all things. Anyways...here's a couple of  snaps to sweep you back to them good ol' dog fightin' lovin' days, that'll melt that ol' soft heart of yours.

(Photos: Copyright Control)

Log A Jog...

"Jogging beats weight lifting for losing belly fat." (usatoday.com)

"All day couch kipping, deep fried anything and that 2am Elvis snack will perhaps not achieve the desired tapered tum look" Thus spoke Dr of the bleedin' obvious with the findings of an eight month study tucked under his ample belt. "Resistance training is great if you're in an occupied country, but for improving strength and increasing lean body mass, you may have to press the horizontal release button and relinquish the four seater sofa once in a while."

Just what the hell is it, Bob?

The lead author and exercise physiologist Cris Slentz said in a Duke news release. "If you are overweight, which two-thirds of the population is, and you want to lose belly fat, aerobic exercise is the better choice because it burns more calories."
Open new file tomorrow: Bleedin' Obvious 1.

Choco Pig Out, Live Forever!

 "Heart experts say more leisure and some chocolate are good for you." (AFP)

"A greater part of any proposed daily physical activity in leisure time should be vigorously avoided. And why? Well, you can't ride a bike on black ice while pigging a box of your fav life savers."

Two hands; always much better than one.

Dr E. Expert popped a few in before he continued; first checking that funding from Chocolate World Inc. was indeed secure for a further five gobbly good years. "It's all based on the individuals own perception of greed intensity," Dr Eddy E said, while wiping the funding grin and orangy twirl remnants from his face. "In Choc-o-land there's no scientific evidence to prevent one from an Olympian 48hour 'Mammoth Maximus' choc-in; though beginners best bring along a biggish bowl and a non squeamish friend." But what about the 1950's Readers Digest section about laughter being the best medicine?  "Hm...not exactly chemo," cautioned Eddy. "And as for hospital beds surrounded by flowers, foliage and fruit fly? All equally useless, as well as pissing off anal Nurse Tidies country wide".
In yet another report, Mitch Muller a professor at the University of Lazyland School of Medicine found similar proof in his newly funded study entitled, 'Similar Proof.' When asking volunteers to first watch a stressful movie such as "Bambi" followed by the yoga yawn promo, "Double Death 3" the Muller and his independent research team found both films irrelevant. Whereas, blood vessel linings, pulse and unhealthy responses to some questions about the vasoconstrictions were detected only in those who swapped chocs for popcorn before the lights-out fumble test.
Eighty per cent milky Muller stated that Lazyland's evidence had concurred with all the other institutes of bias and fat check receivers.
Off the record a perplexed Muller said, "The vigorous scientific pursuit of truth must take place somewhere....I suppose?"