Megrahi's Bad News?

"More bad news for Megrahi: Scottish probation officers are on his trail" (Independent, UK)

The convicted Lockerbie bomber  al-Megrahi.

Scottish justice officials have yet to make contact with al-Megrahi. "We've lost his mobile number and don't know his address and we read some absurd nonsense that 'the probation service is on his trail!' He'll be fetal  on the sofa cryin' out for his mama at the though of us wantin' to phone him!" The unnamed official put a small pill to melt under his tongue, before charging on. "We aren't friggin' psychic or a seventh son of a warlock. Don't some of the UK press know there's a bit of a shooting party at Gaddafi's former residence? So how in the hell are we to find that bastard, who should still be banged up at the Bar-L anyway. We're all takin' a wee bet that the new boys in Tripoli will hang him by the goolies thus saving us a hefty phone bill." I asked what East Renfrewshire Council have to do with Abdelbaset al-Megrahi? "Exactly! The council can barely change a street lamp. And a read (because they tell us bugger all) that Jim Fletcher, the council leader came up with the most original 'uncharted waters' and 'needing to make sure he's in Libya' so that the council can 'monitor his whereabouts'. "Can you believe it? The al-Megrahi fink-rat will be offski!"
I thanked the man who's face now resembled Mr Branson's big red high altitude balloon. "Of course, you know well the main culprit for bringing Scotland into disrepute, regarding this matter....?"  

The King, Druids And Courts...

"High Court deny druid reburial of human remains" (Fallen Scoop)

Who let these bloody sheep in!

Former soldier, wheel clamper and UFO aficionado aka King Arthur Pendragon to you of lowly cast, admitted to 57 earth years but could be much more and he very much wanted the High Court to stop the spade and riddle vandals with some immediacy. "These bone scavengers are committing a heinous act of cosmic proportions. Researchers? My large bottom! These drop-out university trowelers are an affront to our ancestry and mystic ones" But aren't they qualified to examine the human remains? KAP's home made crown spun rapidly on his self anointed head and the secred septer glowed. The crown rotating had commenced for no reason and no breeze or outward interference were apparent. Hmm...
The remains, found at the ancient site of Stonehenge, are believed to be more than 5000 years old.

Also 5000 years and more..The Ridgway (right)

" As I'm of Royal Druid line these jumped up assortment of wig wearers in the Ministry of Justice have no jurisdiction in my priestly realm." KAP stated this with such passion and authority that perhaps one has to wonder.... has KAP indeed walked in some former existence, with the fireaters, jugglers and ode chanters along England's ancient Ridgway?

The oldest known road in the UK also passes by the prehistoric White Horse.

(Photo top: Fallen Scoop. The Ridgway: Copyright Control).
For info go to: www.nationaltrail.co.uk/ridgway

Low Oxygen? Moths Molt!

"Moths molt four to five times before morphing into an adult as a moth or butterfly." (Phsyorg.com)

Polyphemus Motheus. 

At Duke University biologist and part time cover singer of classic '50/'60's tunes, the versatile Fred 'Duke of Earl' Ninjy knew from earlier work that, unlike the Darling Underwing, the horn-billed tobacco caterpillars can't hold their drink or be trusted near a salad. Only when they start a molt and have locused the surrounding countryside and loaded on that all critical 140.8lb times more weight, can they shed their exoskeletons smallecus. But he and other scientists were baffled and still didn't understand how they attended Weight Watcher weigh-ins when the gym's locked and shuttered? In a hot new study, Ninjy's  multi tasky grad student Vivi Callier ( backing vocals and roady) said, "Forget about DD tubsters. The mystery resides elsewhere!"

America runs/sits/sleeps for keeps with too many of these babies! 

And as sure as a dog will mistake you for a lampost if you don't move around once in a while; when Viv measured the size of the caterpillar's respiratory system, guess what? She found that the tracheal tubing had a puncture and if not remedied, would eventually lead to falling off bikes, rickets and Jeff Goldblum syndrome.

The Original 'Duke'

Gene Chandler's site: www.genedukeofearl.com
(Photo top: Marlin)
Surprises and accurate info can be sot out with team: www. physorg.com

Biden: Chinese US Debt Is Safe-ish.

"Giving a speech at Sichuan University, Mr Biden yet again sought to reassure China that its €830 billion holding of US Treasury bonds was safe." (Irish Times)

Ho hum... just one more act of perjury.

“It's safe in our hands and I'll say exactly what I'm told to say as it's not my expertise; gaffs are more my thing," volunteering the soon to be obvious. "As you students of international commerce and finance will know, we've been busy putting our financial house in order by Benny B banging out billions of our soon to be worthless bucks." Thought: I think that might have been my first little G today. "My personal preference is to buy the old trouper Gary U.S. Bonds. He's on the road with some banging new tracks and it's much the safer bet than our Fed Bonds." Asked an opinion of Obama's soon to be released one star rehash? "Well...lets just say, 'Another 4 Wasted Years' ain't no spine tingler...one for his hard core, I guess..."

Mr Biden, when out and about for lunch and cornered by some press near a live what-the-hell-is-this street vendor's, reluctantly agreed that any time soon US interest rates will be something other than planned. He also made a virtue of Treasury Bonds falling following the downgrade. "They're even more sought after than ever! Leprechauns and blind faith are great market tools." Joe spluttered enthusiastically, some interesting street food particles alighting on the faces of less nimble press hacks.“We are still the single-best bet in the world in terms of where to invest if you want to be a pauper before Cinder's coach returns to pumpkin status." In his summing up Mr Biden concluded, "We are the two biggest engines and the two largest economies working together to buoy the world economy."
I guess Joe must have missed that US/China friendly-fraternal ball bouncer of a game.

(Photo top: Ng Han Guan/AP).

Google's Amazing Amazon River 'Street View' Project Begins!

"Google is expanding its Street View service into some of the world's most remote places. It will photograph the River Amazon in Brazil" (BBC)

Here's the Google boat in action and to whet your appetite for more I've a few exclusive 'street views' of the Amazon to share with you! There's a lot of water. There's a lot of trees.

"Nobody knows we are here", said Maria do Socorro Siva Mendonca. Maria is a local. She likes water...and trees.

A Muddy Amazon.

FAS project leader Gabriel Ribenboim said: "It is very important to show the world what a big river this is, and what a lot of water and trees look like."

A Cloudy Amazon.

Can't wait for the next 10,000 miles? Nor can I!

Google Boat Lost...In The Amazon.

(Photos: as stated or Copyright Control).

Under Pressure?

"Syria's Arab neighbours pile on pressure on Assad regime," (BBC)

So glad you could make it, Bashar my friend.

More Gulf Arab nations have withdrawn their ambassadors from Syria. "We've kicked them (Assad and Co) out of the sand pie making contest and that's just for starters!" said the spokesman for Kings, Despots and OPRF (one party rule forever). "The Arab Consolidation Committee," he informed us, "is serious about this Syrian restlessness. We're withdrawing many Ambassadors for what we in the trade call "consultations."   We've learnt as much as we can from our Syrian brothers about how to stick the boot in and other inventive techniques for putting down the undesirable elements who don't know their place." The spokesman stubbed out his bad habit and lit another. "So, you're Willy Western, new press boy in town. You'll soon be writing nonsense about Arab Springs, eh? Habebe; this is how it works. We Arabs say whatever we think that pant suited woman of Obama's wants to hear. Same for all of you fans of elected governments.We have a big tent-in, invite all the Carter family and Arab Spring simpletons; then after goats head soup and a camel race, pack them all off back home."

Ten to one the King's lame nag wins.

"But... we in the West regard as highly significant that no less a figure as King Abdullah of Saudi Arabia has publicly criticised Bashar al-Assad!"

"Yeah, right" as you might say in the land of the free.  (Photos: Copyright Control)

Je Veux Pisser. Now!

"Depardieu 'apologies' for publicly urinating on jet" (BBC)

Gerald Depardieu.

Gerald's friend and fellow actor Edouard Baer said, "For a start, you taxi and are held for three hours on the runway with the lav a no-go area. Sure, the cabin crew can take a leak at their leisure, while we the paying public have to do the cross legs and knot-tie. Gerald has prostate problems and had not been drinking." The French thespian, now center stage went on, "Many here have been in similar situations and it's even worse when traveling with a child."
 The current policy is a puddle waiting to happen. They get you on board the plane in FULL knowledge that it's not going anywhere, anytime soon. So lets keep the fidgety bastards from wondering around and getting in our way. We'll do the old for your safety 'cause it's really quite dangerous parked on the tarmac: Seat Belt Fasten Sign. Yeah, that's always a winner! Then Captain Plummy Voice Superior will announce over the intercom to the flying cigar box trap-ees, some nonsense about the weather five days ago in Timbuktu causing an unexpected delay here and how they really are sorry. Some of the more probable reasons? Cabin crew late for duty because they partied too much and couldn't be arsed to get out of their kip on time; control tower staff asleep on duty and just the usual airport incompetance. Whatever the reasons we've missed our spot and loo lock-down will remain in force.
Next time when in similar circumstances, let's just all do the Depardieu until the toilet Nazis change their policy.